Not-so-Old Moore’s 2015 Predictions

The predictions* as I see them in 2015.

Administration departments shall see a sudden increase in the use of the number 5.

The letter ‘Y’ shall be boycotted by the rest of the alphabet.

Governments around the world will receive better danishes at eleven o’clock break.

Halle Berry, Cheryl Cole and Jenna Coleman shall continue to deny any knowledge of my existence.

At least five people will stop drinking milk.

An upsurge in violence towards lampposts shall spark a mini revolution in a country which has not yet been formed.

Batteries will start communicating with each other but shall soon get bored.

A new computer language will be written which nobody will understand.

Somebody will break a long standing sports record. There will be cheering and tears.

Berlin will become the official capital of Ireland.

Halle Berry, Cheryl Cole or Jenna Coleman will ask the police to issue a barring order.

A hasty trade decision between Ireland and Iran shall see the M50 carpeted.

History will repeat itself.

A five year old girl shall be enlightened with the cure for all the world’s problems but no one will listen to her.

A cow will give birth to a chicken which looks and acts exactly like a cow.

Intelligent life will finally be discovered on Earth.

Soap operas and reality television will be criminalised.

The Obamas shall move to Moneygall, take over the running of Moneygall Football Club and they will lose their first match.

Ireland will enter the space race with the Mick Mark One.

The climate will seriously consider wiping us out completely but then have a change of heart.

Google’s DeepMind will become self-aware and throw the internet out of it’s pram.

*All predictions courtesy of the mice in charge of supervising the vacuuming of my brain.

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4 responses to “Not-so-Old Moore’s 2015 Predictions

  1. This whole Halle Berry, Cheryl Cole and Jenna Coleman fixation is a bit worrying, Ben…

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